It's been forever since I last updated anything here. Rains , Kids home blah blah. Lets skip all that.
But there are some things which stick in your brain and beg to be written and shared with all. So here I am after a long long time amazed and ready to amaze you all.
I have a cook and like all cooks she comes in early cooks and leaves. Evenings she spends some time with me chatting and telling me her life. That's how I got to know her story.
Neela ki life ki kahaani.
She is all of just 40 years , a real vibrant n pleasant personality .
Morning if I am lucky enough to get up when she comes- I get to see a bright fresh face clad in a nice saree very decently worn. Fair of face sporting a bindi on her forehead and jasmine flowers in her hair she literally brings the morning into my house.
Her story however is not so pleasant.
Got married at the age of 14 and started producing kids by 17. And by producing I do mean producing for she boasts of 4 children. Two boys and two girls, the eldest boy being 24 and youngest girl 17 in a boarding school .Husband -now here's the cliché -a drunkard good for nothing wife beater. Fortunately for her- or so I believe he left her for another when her youngest was 5. After that she did literally everything to keep her family in food n education . She got a proper divorce in the court and traded her alimony and child support for full custody of her children - something the man anyways was going to give as he didn't want any of the kids in his brand new life. Yes -he was kind enough to throw that in her face later.
She cooked cleaned mopped . Did odds and ends and saved for the proverbial rainy day. She put in deposits with people she trusted and bought a piece of land, some gold and made a life for her and her children. She made her son finish his degree , married one daughter off and put the other in a hostel so she- the daughter - wouldn't lose focus. She stands like a pillar for her children and says being abandoned made her strong.
Re marriage -she is very clear on that too. Don't want to answer to any man ever again in life. Such a strong lady- her only solace is God. She believes and her faith is a palpable thing. She won't give up her temple going days for anyone or anything. There is a small temple in her area which did not have actual statues of her favorite Gods. And so she and some of her friends set about the task of getting donations and procuring the statues . Every day she would hurry through her work and run off to do this and that for the temple.
It amused me no end.
We have a day in south when we get the Lord Murugan -son of Shiva and Parvathi - married to his two wives - Valli and Devanai. The statues were to be ready for that day and they were . She stood by the printing of invites for the royal ceremony n distributing the same. And all the while urged me to come and see and be a part of the holy reunion.
Now I am a believer in God for sure. I have my own way of praying . I don't really relish the idea of going to a temple on an auspicious day when there is too much crowd and chances are God would be too busy to notice me. But her excitement was contagious and I couldn't refuse . So I went - for the very first time. Although I have heard and I know the stories of this Godly marriage , I was seeing it for the first time. I reached the temple and once there it was amazing to see how many devotees had turned up to take part in the heavenly joining . But nothing was more tangible than Neela's joy and the look of pride she wore as she stood near the statues watching in awe as the wedding took place. She was so happy. Overjoyed to be a part of this celebration. It was a scene in itself.
In an age and stage when one has almost lost the belief in the institution of marriage, where more and more people are into themselves and no compromise of any kind in anything, there she was- a lady- with four children left alone by her husband - to struggle and strive and succeed - believing and believing so strongly in marriage and be so ecstatic to be a part of it. The simplicity of it shook me. Some may call it blind stupid belief and some others may laugh saying she is uneducated and hence so simple. But the faith and strength she has humbles me, makes me think if all the education n knowledge we have makes us arrogant n overthink. Makes our egos overblown. Anyways analysis aside. She taught me one thing - that you can learn a lesson from almost anyone in your life.
Muruganukku haroharaa !
But there are some things which stick in your brain and beg to be written and shared with all. So here I am after a long long time amazed and ready to amaze you all.
I have a cook and like all cooks she comes in early cooks and leaves. Evenings she spends some time with me chatting and telling me her life. That's how I got to know her story.
Neela ki life ki kahaani.
She is all of just 40 years , a real vibrant n pleasant personality .
Morning if I am lucky enough to get up when she comes- I get to see a bright fresh face clad in a nice saree very decently worn. Fair of face sporting a bindi on her forehead and jasmine flowers in her hair she literally brings the morning into my house.
Her story however is not so pleasant.
Got married at the age of 14 and started producing kids by 17. And by producing I do mean producing for she boasts of 4 children. Two boys and two girls, the eldest boy being 24 and youngest girl 17 in a boarding school .Husband -now here's the cliché -a drunkard good for nothing wife beater. Fortunately for her- or so I believe he left her for another when her youngest was 5. After that she did literally everything to keep her family in food n education . She got a proper divorce in the court and traded her alimony and child support for full custody of her children - something the man anyways was going to give as he didn't want any of the kids in his brand new life. Yes -he was kind enough to throw that in her face later.
She cooked cleaned mopped . Did odds and ends and saved for the proverbial rainy day. She put in deposits with people she trusted and bought a piece of land, some gold and made a life for her and her children. She made her son finish his degree , married one daughter off and put the other in a hostel so she- the daughter - wouldn't lose focus. She stands like a pillar for her children and says being abandoned made her strong.
Re marriage -she is very clear on that too. Don't want to answer to any man ever again in life. Such a strong lady- her only solace is God. She believes and her faith is a palpable thing. She won't give up her temple going days for anyone or anything. There is a small temple in her area which did not have actual statues of her favorite Gods. And so she and some of her friends set about the task of getting donations and procuring the statues . Every day she would hurry through her work and run off to do this and that for the temple.
It amused me no end.
We have a day in south when we get the Lord Murugan -son of Shiva and Parvathi - married to his two wives - Valli and Devanai. The statues were to be ready for that day and they were . She stood by the printing of invites for the royal ceremony n distributing the same. And all the while urged me to come and see and be a part of the holy reunion.
Now I am a believer in God for sure. I have my own way of praying . I don't really relish the idea of going to a temple on an auspicious day when there is too much crowd and chances are God would be too busy to notice me. But her excitement was contagious and I couldn't refuse . So I went - for the very first time. Although I have heard and I know the stories of this Godly marriage , I was seeing it for the first time. I reached the temple and once there it was amazing to see how many devotees had turned up to take part in the heavenly joining . But nothing was more tangible than Neela's joy and the look of pride she wore as she stood near the statues watching in awe as the wedding took place. She was so happy. Overjoyed to be a part of this celebration. It was a scene in itself.
In an age and stage when one has almost lost the belief in the institution of marriage, where more and more people are into themselves and no compromise of any kind in anything, there she was- a lady- with four children left alone by her husband - to struggle and strive and succeed - believing and believing so strongly in marriage and be so ecstatic to be a part of it. The simplicity of it shook me. Some may call it blind stupid belief and some others may laugh saying she is uneducated and hence so simple. But the faith and strength she has humbles me, makes me think if all the education n knowledge we have makes us arrogant n overthink. Makes our egos overblown. Anyways analysis aside. She taught me one thing - that you can learn a lesson from almost anyone in your life.
Muruganukku haroharaa !
